Anger Management

Posted by Prof.N.Gurunatha Naidu On 09/09/2023 10:02:52

Today, life has become much more complex due to constant changes and stiff competition prevailing in day-to-day walks of life. A human being is a bundle of desires with many aspirations. Everyone is keen to satisfy his/her needs and wants. People are not willing to go beyond their comfort zone and are interested in taking a risk, More commercial in their attitude, love, and affinity is coming down. Human beings do not even hesitate to damage themselves or others for the fulfillment of greed, lust, and innumerable desires. Requirements may be to fulfill physical, social, psychological, family, or to have power or status quo. No one can satisfy all these at a time and this leads to stress and anger. When there is a huge gap between expectations and actual, it leads to more stress and it causes more anger with imbalanced emotions.

Stressful anxiety anger or conflict leads to a change in one's mood and consequently, it will have an impact on healthy relationships. Right relationships determine the quality of life. It all depends on how balanced we are in our emotions. Emotions always trigger our actions.

 Anger is a basic human emotion that serves as an important survival function to communicate with others. If something goes wrong, one must learn how to express anger and anxiety and also must learn how to manage anger. As Gandhiji rightly said, "Anger must be for the right cause at the right time for the right purpose". One must speak always about what is useful. Only a calm mind can make effective decisions.

Anger is a handy weapon that sometimes spoils and destroys long-term relationships in no time. Many people repent after exhibiting their uncontrollable anger. William Shakespeare rightly said, "Nothing in this world is good or bad but thinking makes it so." Mind is not a dustbin to keep anger, hatred, and jealousy. But it is the treasure box to keep love, happiness, and sweet memories (Swami Vivekanand). When a saint was asked "What is Anger?", he gave a beautiful answer. " It is a punishment we give our-self, for somebody else mistake!".John Milton said " The mind is in its own place and in itself; can make a heaven of hell: and a hell of heaven. 

"krodhad bhavati sammohah sammoht smriti vibhramah |
  smriti-bhranshad buddhi-nasho buddhi nashat pranashyat | | "

Translation:

Anger leads to clouding of judgment, which results in bewilderment of the memory. When the memory is bewildered, the intellect gets destroyed; and when the intellect is destroyed, one is ruined.

Anger Management Techniques:

1. Connect with creativity with peaceful and joyful thoughts.
2. Avoid hot-button topics.
3. Prepare a daily 'To-do’ list to avoid stress.
4. If you don't have a solution to a problem no need to feel anxiety and anger.
5. Share your feelings with the right person. Don't voice your feelings to the wrong person.
6. Adapt and adjust to survive
7. Manage your time effectively and be more assertive.
8. Accept mistakes and avoid procrastination
9. Find a calm place and sit and relax with a few deep breaths and take more water.
10. Go for a long walk and choose a book which you are interested to read & relax
11. Don't criticize, condemn, and comment on others.
12. Don't believe in gossip and don't spread gossip.
13. Decide your priorities in advance and plan for the right actions
14. Face the facts. Find out the origin and find the right solution.
15. Do regular exercise. Practice meditation to keep your mind cool and calm.

Life is not qualified by fluent English, branded clothes, or a rich lifestyle. It is measured by the number of faces who smile when they hear your name!!

If we follow the law of devotion our thought process is totally different. The law of devotion is the ability to offer every thought and every action to the higher principle within us is the law of devotion.

Conclusion:

If you have been offended by someone - forgive them. If you have offended someone apologize.  Don't drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It does not matter who was right. Someone once said, “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die". Don't take that poison. Forgive, forget, and move on with your life. Family and friends are most important part of your life. Treasure the good time, treasure the laughter, treasure the memories; but most importantly treasure the people. 

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